November 9, 2025
Dharma Message

People are shopping, decorating the house, and getting ready to entertain family, friends and waiting for the little ol’ man in red. We are thinking what each family member and friend would like for the holiday. There is merriment in the air. People are friendlier and smile all the time. This is the season to be jolly and hoping for peace on earth. Yet, life brings us what it will.

The holidays can be a most difficult time for many people. We forget those who are lost or have physical or mental health issues. Do we take the time to share a little cheer or compassion with them? It should not be only during the holidays, but every day. It takes only a moment to wish someone a happy day.

My family spent each holiday without my father at the table. He had a little café in the heart of “skid row” and he kept the doors open for those without family or those who did not have enough money for a meal. He never made judgments or scorned these people’s life decisions. They had no family or lost their family from their circumstances and my father believed that no one should be alone during the holidays. He left the doors open to share his time with others.

We would have the holiday meal without him but we understood his compassion. We would open our gifts but always kept one unopened so he could watch us open it later. We waited for him to come home so that we could give him our gifts. He knew what they were, for it was the same each year. Each holiday he would get an expensive box of cigars (the ones in the metal or glass tubes), white socks, home made card and handkerchiefs. But he was always surprised and so appreciative. He would then share his cigars with others the next day and brag about who gave it to him.

My father witnessed many people wither away from various issues and it was these people he would foster as a family, if only for 20 minutes. My father did not believe in charity for he understood that it was humiliating for them to ask for a hand out. If they could not pay for a meal, which cost seventy-five cents at that time, my father would ask them what they had in their possession. Whatever the item, he would put it on the shelf and tell them to pick it up when they could pay. I got my first watch in trade for a turkey meal and I treasured and wore it for many years after.

I was taught well. Looking through my father’s eyes, he taught me not to see the disenfranchised. I was taught to see people who made decisions that may have taken a detour. I see families who happen to live differently than me. Buddhism guides us to NOT discriminate or place prejudices on their choices.

However, it does not take that much to give a little of our selves. We can silently share our Namu Amida Butsu and share our gratitude and appreciation to our own families. We share our thankfulness that our family is healthy and well. We share our compassion and love with them everyday we have them in our lives. During this holiday and everyday, it is Namu Amida Butsu.

Have a wonderful and safe holiday. We share Namu Amida Butsu in gratitude and thankfulness for everyday we have family, friends, health and Nembutsu.

Gassho,
Rev. Seijo Naomi Nakano